EVEN ITS KILL ME

I've got a lot of things to do tonight
I'm so sick of making lists of things I'll never finish
I've lived here for the last twelve years
Since early 1995 all my shit has been in boxes
But if I had a little more time to kill
I'd settle every little stupid thing,
Yeah, you'd think that I would

But I'm too tired to go to sleep tonight
And I'm too weak to follow dreams tonight
For the first time in a long time I can say that I want to try
To get better and overcome each moment
In my own way...

I wonder if I'll ever lose my mind
I tried hard for a while but then I kind of gave up
Winter is a killer when the sun goes down
"I'm really not as stubborn as I seem"
Said the knuckle to the concrete

But I'm too tired to go to sleep tonight
And I'm too weak to follow dreams tonight
For the first time in a long time I can say that I want to try
To get better and overcome each moment
In my own way...

I'm not saying that I've given up
I'm just trying not to think as much I used to
'Cause never is lonely little messed up word
Maybe I'll get it right someday

For the first time in a long time
I can say that I want to try
I feel helpless for the most part, but I'm learning to open my eyes
And the sad truth of the matter is I'll never get over it,
But I'm gonna try
To get better and overcome each moment
In my own way...

I so want to get back on track
And I'll do whatever it takes
Even if it kills me...